Out of Office: The Importance of Taking Time Off

I have just returned home from a 2.5-week vacation in England, and some thoughts I’ve had lately around taking time off, why it’s imperative that we TAKE time off, and HOW to take time off really solidified for me. I wanted to share them with you all today, while we still have a few weeks of summer holidays left, in case you’re contemplating a little getaway of your own. 

My husband is from the UK, so we travel there every summer to see family and friends and usually take a side trip on our own while we’re over there. This year we went to Cornwall, which was absolutely charming and delightful—except that I had the flu the whole time. We’re talking nausea, fever, congestion—the works! I tried to be a trooper, so I loaded up on meds and headed out to see all the many (MANY) sites Cornwall has to offer. Luckily, all the things to do and see in Cornwall are outside, and it wasn’t crowded. I didn’t worry that I might be spreading my germs around.  

I was pretty miserable though. I was exhausted from a busy work period (one of my sprints) and was desperate to slow down and catch my breath. My husband, however, thought it would be fun to drive around to different places every day and stay in different hotels. The places he chose were fantastic. Castles, places made famous by history and literature, and all-around beautiful places, but it meant waking up, pulling wrinkled clothes out of a suitcase, re-packing the rest, checking out, driving around all day, finding the next hotel, and doing it all over again. 

For him? That’s exciting, and that excitement and constant stimulation is how he relaxes. For me? It just exhausts me further. 

But again, I was sick as a dog anyway, so at least my misery was combined into a 2-for-1 deal. 

 

 

After 6 days in Cornwall, we went to the Isle of Wight, where my husband was taking part in the annual week-long “Cowes Week” sailing regatta. This was the week that I needed desperately. Finally feeling a bit better, staying in the same Airbnb for all 5 days, and with time and space to myself, I was able to fully relax, unpack my suitcase (hang up my dresses!) do some writing, reading, shopping, and get inspiration from new sights and sounds. Some dear friends from Ohio happened to be in the south of England as well and came down to Cowes to spend a day with us.  

In the evenings, when Paul was finished and recovered from sailing each day, and I had written and read and shopped to my heart’s content, we would go out for dinner and walk around town a bit. I slept 8 hours a night, ate ice cream, drank Sauvignon Blanc overlooking the water, and refilled my well. 

We had a bit of a bumpy re-entry due to a serious lack of judgment exhibited by our housesitter, but now that the dust is settling, I am excited to get back to work. I had the time off I needed, but more importantly, I had the KIND I needed. 

 

 

So, Why is it important to take time off—especially for those of us who work at a craft? I remember one of my cello mentors bragging to me about how he had never in his life taken more than 1 day off from practicing. And that he rarely traveled without his cello. His wife sat there rolling her eyes. “It’s the worst,” she said–looking a bit sad. 

These days, he DOES take more time off from the instrument. He hikes, relaxes, reads, and spends time with his growing family. He seems a lot happier for it, too! Is he less respected and revered as a cellist? Not one iota. 

When we are steeped in our craft–whether that is painting, making music, or manipulating spreadsheets, it can be hard to get an eagle-eye view of things. We can start to obsess over the tiniest details (which, to be fair, is what sets the greats apart from the merely good) but it’s important to step back now and again and get a bit of perspective. Only by being away from our main industry and seeing the world through different lenses, can we get that view. 

And mentally and physically, taking time away is incredibly important. There is no question the world is experiencing a mental health crisis at the moment. Part of that stems from the intense, 24/7 hustle culture we’ve experienced over the last 20 years. We have all been put under this collective pressure to be productive ALL THE TIME. I mean, I talk a lot about how to stop wasting time, how to work more efficiently, and how to streamline processes, but that’s not so that we can work MORE. it’s so we can relax more while still getting our work done! 

 

 

Another struggle I see many artists encounter is the fact that their entire sense of identity is tied to their craft. The thought of not being able to do it, of not being “good enough” at it, of getting a career-ending injury, or not getting the opportunities they need and want create such a high level of anxiety that they become utterly frozen and unable to create. 

Taking time off, and away from one’s craft allows us to expand our sense of identity. Your role as an artist might be the biggest and most important part of your identity (at least right now) but it doesn’t need to be the ONLY part of your identity. Knowing that you are a full human being with other interests and abilities can ease that anxiety. 

So I implore you—please make sure you are taking time off. I encourage everyone to take out their yearly calendars and schedule in their time off FIRST, and then schedule work around that. 

Next year, I’m even considering going full European and taking the entire month of August off. I know not everyone can do that—thankfully I am married to a teacher so we have that time. I intend to make the most of it! 

 

 

Okay, so we’re all in agreement now that we’ll actually be better at what we do if we take time away from it. 

The first step is to Determine what you NEED from this time off

Are you exhausted? Are you feeling stuck and uninspired? Are you bored? The question I like to ask is “What is missing right now that this time off can replenish” 

• The luxury of time to cook and relax over long meals
• Quality time with good friends
• Connection with my family
• A sense of romance with my partner
• A feeling that I am an adventurous person
• Sleep
• Time to read the ever-growing stack of books
• Space to find answers to the questions that keep bubbling up
• Uninterrupted time to work
• New ideas

Sometimes it’s a combination of several of these things, but that doesn’t mean it’s not possible. Uninterrupted time to work + A feeling that I am an adventurous person = book a treehouse in Costa Rica and write from amongst the clouds. 

 

Step 2 Figure out your personal default relaxation style

 

What makes you feel ready for a new week? Feeling like you really made the most of a weekend or Quiet introspection? Would you rather spend a Sunday afternoon going for a family bike ride, followed by a trip to the county fair, followed by some time wandering around a local museum? Or would you prefer to sit on your back porch with an iced tea and a good book? 

If it’s the former, then make sure you plan loads of fun activities on your trip. A big city or an exciting long-distance hike might be just the thing to disconnect you from work and fill you with inspiration. 

If it’s the latter, you might want to consider picking one home base for your time off. A house on a lake for a week. Where you can read, swim, cook, paint, whatever you want. Others can hike, kayak, and explore to their hearts’ desires. You can rest. 

Now, this doesn’t mean that you can’t do, or enjoy the other way. It’s just going to require a different energy from you.  If you’re more of the adventurous, need-to-be busy all the time type that is heading off for a week at a lake house? You might want to bring some books that you’re excited to read, or a project that you can work on at the house, or a challenging jigsaw puzzle. If you’re more inclined to rest, and you’ve agreed to go on a 5-day backpacking trip? Just know that it’s going to be more draining than rejuvenating, but it’ll be worth it. (and be sure to plan a couple of rest days along the way, or just after). 

Don’t be afraid to ask for what you need. Are you craving a lush outdoor meal cooked and shared with many friends? Ask for it. 

Do you need everyone to leave you alone for 2 hours each morning so that you can write and meditate? Ask for that uninterrupted time. 

 

Step 3: Respect the differences

 

Different people traveling with you have their own list of What they need, and how they relax. It might not be possible to make everyone happy all the time, but as long as everyone gets a bit of what they need, and as long as everyone understands what the other people need, you can make it work. 

• You can go on an activity-filled camping trip—as long as there are periods of quiet rest and reading time at the campsite each evening. 
• You can spend a week in a secluded cabin—as long as you plan a couple of day trips to the closest city or museum, or rent mountain bikes for those who want a bit more stimulation. 
• You can have everyone in the travel party plan a day to their liking, and everyone goes along with it. Or, if it’s a large party, provide options for everyone to do what they please on any given day. 

 

 

Step 4 Give Yourself a Buffer

 

The African safari, the trip to Antarctica, the hike to Machu Picchu. Oh? Do you have the same list? That’s right. Even though I know that to feel fully relaxed, I need quiet downtime, there are things in this world that I’d love to see (or see again) that require that I get pretty active. 

It would be a huge mistake for me to leave for this kind of trip the day after a big event, or immediately following a big work sprint. My brain will spend the first few days of the trip wondering if everything is okay—checking the work email multiple times, worrying about clients, etc. I know myself well enough to know that I need a solid week between intense work mode and time off mode. In that week, I’m still working. Putting things to bed, dealing with changes that need to be made, wrapping it up, doing a post-mortem, whatever it is. Putting things away and properly closing the book on it. 

I once took a group of 10 students to Kenya to film a documentary. The Music Director in charge of the sponsoring organization left on an earlier flight to go on a sailing trip in Italy–no wifi, no internet—no reaching him. Even when the rest of us got stranded first in Nairobi, then Johannesburg, then in London. FOR DAYS.  No help. We were on our own. We handled it, of course, but he still feels terrible. Always give yourself a buffer between a work sprint and a big trip. 

By the time I’m headed off on the trip, I’m ready. My brain has unwound itself from its previous task and has had time to start thinking solely about the trip and the exciting anticipation of it all. 

Likewise, give yourself a bit of a buffer on the way back, too. Try not to return from a trip the day before you have to start your next work project. A) your flight might be delayed/canceled, etc. Your luggage might get lost. You might have to spend an entire day cleaning the mess your degenerate housesitter left for you. It’s just so nice to have a whole day of puttering before you have to get back into work mode. Laundry, go through the mail, stock up on groceries, and plan the week ahead. 

 

Step 5: Learn to go with the flow

 

It’s going to rain. You’re going to get a cold (or the flu). Your flight will be delayed or canceled. There will be a train strike. There will be a flat tire on the rental car. The site you planned the whole day around will be closed because of a plumbing issue. 

These moments are upsetting and believe me, I want to lose it like anyone else. But at the end of the day, you’re going to have memories of this. And those memories are either going to be that something went wrong and you went ballistic, or that something went wrong, and this is the fun and funny way we made the best of it. It’s the difference between creating tension for the rest of the trip and putting everyone on edge, and keeping things relaxed and easy-going. 

I’m admittedly not great at this—particularly when I’m tired and It involves something that I didn’t really want to do in the first place, but my friend Sandy is AMAZING at it. She is seriously the most go-with-the-flow person I have ever met. And I lived with her for 2 years, so I know it’s legit. The result is that everyone always looks forward to spending time with her because we know there will be no dramas, you know it’s going to be fun, and there’s no worry that something might go wrong. So whenever I find myself In these moments I just ask myself “How would Sandy act?” and I do that. 

 

Step 6: Set a few intentions, (including some easily attainable ones) for your time away

Make sure you’re able to give yourself some clear wins. On my list for this trip? 

• Eat fish and chips, an ice cream cone, and a cream tea. 

I was going to England for god’s sake, so this was not going to be difficult, but each time I checked one of them off––The fish and chips lunch on the water in Lyme Regis, the ice cream cone (fresh strawberry, of course!) while wandering the gardens at Queen Victoria’s summer estate on the Isle of Wight, and finally—on our very last day, that decadent cream tea with our Aunt, Uncle, and cousins––it felt like a win, like I was “doing it right.” Clear win. 

• Find some quiet time to figure out my questions regarding the book. 

The writing of my book is almost finished, but I’ve been questioning the overall flow of the material. It was getting in my way and everything was beginning to feel disjointed. I knew I just needed a few quiet, uninterrupted days to think it through and indeed, it all became clear when I had that time in Cowes. Check √

• Continue our tradition of hunting for and bringing home certain items

A Christmas ornament for our tree, a tea towel, and some artwork for the house–one of which always needs to be a watercolor of some site we visited, and some sort of textile. This year, we found our Xmas ornament and a gorgeous watercolor print of St. Michael’s Mount, a tea towel from Cornwall, some linen napkins from my favorite shop in Cowes, and 3 yards of the most perfect Indian block-print fabric for some new throw pillows. 

This is one of my favorite travel traditions and one I highly recommend. Even on the rainiest day in Cornwall, when I was feeling like death warmed over, looking for a watercolor or a Christmas ornament gave us a joint mission and kept me distracted. 

• See all of our family and friends in the UK. 

This was also going to be a win since we had plans in place to see (almost) everyone. Living so far away from family means that one has to put in some effort to keep those connections strong. And while that can often mean different groups on different days, and driving to and fro, it’s always worth it to be able to re-connect. To sit face to face and hear about the latest medical worries, celebrate the birthdays, anniversaries, and new babies on the way. 

One important note here is that each one of my intentions (with maybe the exception of the food one, but again—that was a no-brainer)  is about a process. It was an action I could take, rather than the outcome. I was in control of whether or not I found time to work on the book. The goal was not to figure out the book questions. The goal was to find quiet time and space to think about and work on the book. 

The goal was not to “forge strong bonds with our family members.”  It was merely to make time to see them. Something that can easily be done. Do we feel that the bonds have been strengthened? Yes. But that was a happy bonus. 

And the intention was to remember to look for those items. If we hadn’t found a watercolor to add to our hallway of travel memories, I would have been a little disappointed, but most of the fun is in looking for one because it means pouring through the bins of street artists and in cute, out-of-the-way galleries. 

 

 

The result of our trip was that we felt we did what we wanted to do. We happened to have great results, we made some wonderful memories–both with each other and with our friends and family, and we both claimed what we needed. Paul got to run around and see things and he got to sail, and I got to read, had space and time to think, and some time to eat ice cream and do some shopping. 

Seeing new things and being in new environments got me excited to get home and bring my new ideas and thoughts with me. To implement them into my work and into my life. 

I’m grateful that we are in a position to be able to travel like this, but taking time off from your craft can come in many different forms. My friend and fellow freelance musician, Vanessa and I used to take 1 single day each summer and drive up to Rockport, MA and have “summer in a day.” No shop talk allowed, we would pop into all of the tourist shops, eat lobster and fries, ice cream (obviously) and climb on the rocks at the beach. Even that felt restorative and rejuvenating. 

So please, do what you can, let’s make the most of these remaining weeks of summer!